Indecisiveness is toxic

Indecisiveness does not serve your goals or your sanity. It can be both paralyzing and stressful. But one decision can change your life. So don’t take them lightly. I know, I know that sounds like a contradicting statement, because on one hand you may be taking too much time and on the other not enough. For that I say, be mindful, not reluctant. In this age of rapid-fire change, we must be mindful of our choices from moment to moment and minute to minute. And when I say mindful, I mean mindful that we are not making decisions based on what we don’t want. Which means we have to be clear about what we do want. Indecisiveness is a symptom of a lack of clarity and self-worth. When you are tapped into your individual power and know not only what you want, but who you are, decision-making becomes a much simpler exercise. When faced with a decision you can quickly evaluate which path forward makes the most sense for you. You’re not swirling around a zillion potential outcomes, because you know the outcome you desire.

You also know that failure is a gift that prepares you for the greatness ahead. So you cannot make a wrong decision and you should not regret decisions. You should learn. In the below excerpt from Trini’s Blues, I talk about a moment when I realized that it was my decisions based on what I did not want that led me down a path of abuse, neglect, and many hardships. At that moment, I did not want to go back and change my decisions. I wanted to reflect on them and take their beautiful lessons with me. I called the collection of those lesson’s a mosaic. Because they were hard and uncertain times but in hindsight, they were the building blocks of who I am today. And I am beautiful! I am a mighty screenwriter, emotional performer, acclaimed author, inspiring survivor, and enthusiastic thriver.   And nobody can tell me different. 

Today, I see the magic of making decisions. The clearer and more authentic I become to my pure self, the more potent my decisions are. The universe has literally shifted so that my vision can be realized. Can a little black girl who lost her mama at 5 years old, find her way and grow to become a screenwriter & author? YES. Can we recover from violations and neglect? YES!!!!!!!! So go on… Give it a try. Get clear and decide.

Yes, it is that simple.

peace and blessings on blessings!
B.A. Buie.

Please enjoy this excerpt from Trini’s Blues: And If You Do Not Love Yourself…


So I throw them all down in the form of words that take shape in my journal. Each story representing the purging of broken pieces from deep within me.

Faith tells me to just place the broken piece down. Let them land exactly where their supposed to be.
Forgiveness allows me to graciously sort it without emotional limitations. It says, "there is no need to be burdened, or shammed. Lay them down and handle with care. All of them. With care" 
The ugly, the bloodied, the forgotten, the angered, the selfishness, the abandoning, the oppressed, the jealous, the pity, the insecure, the hatred, the monsters.

So, instead of burning all the broken pieces, I lay them together. 
Designing a colorful patchwork that brings me so much satisfaction to rub my hands all over. 
Feeling the immaculate imperfection of jagged edges and rough beginnings. Kneading the tender endings. Embracing the unsuspecting corners. Seeing the colors with my fingers. Tasting every bitter and sweet moment with my palms. 
One breath I'm smiling, the next I'm crying. 
Daring myself to remember. 
Making sense. Making words. Making magic.
Every sentence is lightening my load. I breath and my chest gets bigger and bigger with every placement. 
Next, feeling the euphoric release of pressure as I exhale. 
I don't want to take the broken pieces back home with me. I want to take this mosaic. 
A mosaic forged by forgiving hands.

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